No snow for Christmas, but holly up the whazoo

Vicki and I went on this epic trek to a pub called the Stork at Conder Green. We followed the canal for a good part of the way and we decided to take this shortcut to get down to the canal. There was this steep (as in cliff-like) path covered in mud and moss covered rocks that led down from the bridge over the canal. We could take this route or walk about 150 meters out of our way to go down a more gradual path. Vicki and I decided to go for the gusto. She made it down easily -- she's a dancer, you know. I, however, was considerably less graceful. About halfway down, I did a Saturday morning cartoon fall. I was standing there, knowing I was doomed and just waiting for the right moment of comedic timing. Then, suddenly, my feet shot out from under me straight up in the air; I landed on my back and slid, rolled and exploded the rest of the way down ending up in a holly bush with sharp, pointy, evil little leaves stuck in all my 2000 body parts.

This put me in a foul mood for the rest of the journey.

We went to the Stork again a couple of days ago and it was more enjoyable. I didn't fall down a cliff. I didn't get holly up the whazoo. And it took far less time.

The trip was faster this time because we went by bike. I had brought mine over from Canada and Santa bought one for Vicki. He just delivered it a little early. It's a hybrid which means it has large diameter skinny road wheels and a mountain bike frame with gearing somewhere between the two. She seems quite pleased with it. From the Stork we went off in the direction of a ruined abbey but were stopped by a herd of rabid Jersey cows who refused to let us past. Instead we took the bridleway home behind Ashton Hall.

Yesterday we went on another epic adventure to the town of Morecombe. Morecombe is a failed faded seaside resort town a la imitation Blackpool. It has many empty hotels, some quite grand-looking, and many cheesy attractions including "Frontier Town" which has a big ancient-looking roller coaster. There are water slides, and video game parlors, and bowling alleys, and big tacky pubs and a Burger King. All of it looks rather dingy and tragic. Vicki thinks its depressing but I find it rather tragic and romantic and beautiful.

We weren't there to go bowling or to Frontier Town (which was closed in any case). We were there because Morecombe is where ASDA is. ASDA is a bit like Superstore or Food For Less in Canada. It's a huge, frightening grocery store filled with danger and low prices. We were there to buy a turkey and other Christmas food items.

We decided to go with the turkey instead of a lamb roast for a number of reasons which pretty much boiled down to "stuffing, stuffing, stuffing."

The holiday plan now is to head off on the bikes for a couple of days, staying at B and B's in the country. We haven't decided on the snow question yet. It would be nice to see some snow at Christmas but it may not be that practical on the bikes.

I understand there is snow in most parts of Canada now. I hope it provides a suitable background to a beautiful Christmas season for you and your loved ones.

Merry Christmas,

Chris