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October 21, 2003

Comfortable Underwear

I always get homesick this time of year. Autumn has always been my favourite season. There isn't really much of an autumn worth mentioning here in England, but autumn is a noticeable and lovely season back in Canuckville.

The charming spouse and I did a spot of shoe shopping the weekend before last which made me reminisce even more for the great outdoors. She ended up buying her new shoes in an outdoorsy store and I was filled with consumer lust for all manner of cool outdoorsy things: four season tents, thermarests, high-tech hiking socks (ooh socks, I love good socks), just stuff.

Leathermans now come in all manner of bright colours! Did you know that? Is that Cool, or what!

And so I was thinking of the old bush life when I was at this dance show. Which may go some way to explaining the following dialogue.

VICKI: So, James, did you like the show?

JAMES: Absolutely. There's nothing better than watching a group of young women prance around in their underwear.

VICKI: Was it the underwear you liked or the dance?

JAMES: Oh, the underwear.

CHRIS: Yes, nothing better than ladies underwear. I'm wearing some right now.

JAMES: Me too.

CHRIS: I knew a guy when I was working in the bush that swore the most comfortable undergarments in the world were women's underpants worn backwards. Apparently they provide a great deal of room at the front and act as a kind of thong at the rear.

JAMES: Are you wearing yours backwards now then?

CHRIS: (PAUSE) Well, no. I lied about the ladies underwear thing, James. I'm actually wearing boxers.

JAMES: Oh... Right.

CHRIS: Of course, these days, with the fashion having turned to proper thongs, I suspect the comfort factor no longer holds backwards.

JAMES: Yes, a thong worn backwards might be a touch distracting.

And then the performance began again.

It's times like these that really make me miss the bush. There's nothing like some crisp clean air and being trapped in a camp in the middle of nowhere with a man in backwards facing panties to make you feel alive.

Posted by YandaMan at October 21, 2003 9:20 PM
Category: Humour , Journal