Farts Like Gold: 5 -- Making Breakfast

I slept on the bus, but not until after I let my new friend Tony sign my gauze. I watched as he started to draw a heart with his black felt pen. He noticed me watching him and turned it into a flower.

"I didn't want you to get the wrong idea," he said.

I nodded. "Don't worry about it."

He took his coat out of his daypack and scrunched it up against the window. He winked at me then pressed his head against the coat and closed his eyes.

I took a couple more Tylenol 3s, pulled my cap down over my eyes, slumped down in the seat and stretched my legs out. I didn't sleep much but at least my hand stopped throbbing for a while.

We pulled into Edmonton just before 5:30 in the morning. Tony collected his luggage while I got into a cab. He ran over and knocked on the window. I rolled it down.

"I just thought maybe we could meet up later for a drink. Not because... you know. But because. Well, you know."

"Don't worry about it." I said. "Do you know the Commercial Hotel on Whyte Avenue?"

"Yeah."

"Well, depending on what happens with my hand, I'll see you there. But not tonight. I'm betting I'll either be in the hospital or trying to sleep."

"How about tomorrow?"

"How about Friday?" I said. "Come to think of it, what day is it today?"

"Wednesday."

"Perfect. Friday it is then."

"Great. See you Friday."

I rolled up the window. Tony had a huge grin on his face.

"University Hospital," I said to the driver.

Around about the time the bus was pulling into Edmonton, Cassie was pulling muffins out of the oven back in camp. The sun was rising. April was making breakfast burritos. Everyone else was still asleep.

"Do you think Kent is in Edmonton, yet?" asked April.

"Don't know. I know I'm not. The lucky bastard!" Cassie tipped the muffins out of the tray on to a cooling rack. "I think he said it was an overnight bus trip. But I don't know what overnight means. Might be there. Might be not."

April was grating cheese for the burritos. "I wish I was in Edmonton. I'd love to sit in a chair with a back. I'd love to sleep in! I want to get up when it's light and go to bed when it's dark. How much longer until the break?"

"The season has barely started! We've only been out here for a couple of weeks. You've got a long way to go, sugar!" Cassie said. "But somehow It feels like it's ending already. I hate it when people leave camp. I love Lucy to bits, but she just makes men stupid. I don't know exactly what went on up there. But I do know that it would have taken a mighty leap of stupidity for Kent to break his hand. And there's only one force in the universe that can make that man that stupid."

"Oh come on. It sounds like it could have happened to anybody. And Kent said it was his own fault. These things just happen."

"Well, some things happen. And some things that happen are good things. And some things that happen are bad things. And some things that happen are just butt stupid things." Cassie dumped another load of muffins on to the rack. A couple didn't come out. She put the tray on the stove and grabbed a knife from the counter. She dug the muffins out with the knife and put them with the others. She added the tray to the pile by the sink and pulled the last tray out of the other oven.

April dumped the cheese she had grated into a bowl and got some eggs out of a cooler at the front of the bus. She picked up two of the eggs, one with each hand, and cracked them into a bowl. She rotated her fingers to separate the shells and tossed them into the garbage. Then she picked up another two eggs. She said, "I don't believe he did anything really stupid. I'm sure there was an element of bad luck involved."

"Maybe. Maybe. Maybe," said Cassie. "I just know when Lucy's around he doesn't pay attention to much of anything else."

"You mean when Lucy's around, he doesn't pay any attention to you."

"Same thing."

April laughed.

Cassie wiped off the cutting board April had been grating cheese onto and started slicing tomatoes for the lunch table. April continued to crack eggs two at a time and dump them in the bowl.

"You're just upset he won't be around to help out in camp," April said.

"He only helped out because Lucy was always in here," said Cassie. "Lucy hid in here to avoid the guys. Kent followed Lucy. And we used Kent to change propane bottles and wash dishes. It's the circle of life, sugar."

Cassie put the tomatoes on a plate and got a tupperware container of luncheon meat out of one of the coolers. She grabbed a couple of peppers and started chopping them up. April had put a full flat of eggs into the bowl. She added some pepper and salt and a liberal slosh of milk and began mixing. A strand of hair fell in front of her eyes and she blew it away with a puff of breath.

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