Yanda Time

November 20, 2004

Funicular

(more pics)

Thanks in part to a friend's slightly snide comment, I impulse bought a pair of shoes at Gatwick Airport, throwing out my last pair of impulse bought shoes (I bought those in Lanzarote). I am now on top of a mountain in Barcelona with bandaids on my feet.

I admit to a problem buying shoes. I binge-buy my shoes -- which is not to say I buy many shoes. Instead, I spend hours, days, months, trying shoes on and not buying them. This drives everyone around me mad. Finally, I get so fed up with myself that I buy a completely random pair whether they fit or not. I don't think I've ever bought a pair of shoes I like. I am convinced the perfect pair of shoes is out there somewhere. These, judging from the bandaids, are probably not them.

I didn't walk up the mountain, in case you are tempted to take the shoes' side and point out that mountain climbing in new shoes is bound to result in some kind of podiatric discomfort. I rode the Peu Funicular and then walked (admittedly uphill) over to where I am now, Tibadabo. I plan to take what I assume is the Grosse Funicular (it looks much bigger) back down. There is a beautiful cathedral-like thing here -- the Sacred Cor. It is another character flaw of mine that I seem incapable of absorbing any historical information about things that I see while traveling. All I'm sure of is the name and the fact that it's pretty and on a big hill overlooking Barcelona. There's also an amusement park attached to it, clinging to the side of a cliff.

This I think is very cool. It's not entirely clear whether the amusement park is run by the Church but I hope it is. It's a great marketing ploy. Imagine a couple of teenagers out on a date. They ride up the funicular, their minds firmly on sin.

Speaking of sin, that phrase itself sounds depraved: "up the funicular".

Anyway, up the funicular they go. They run off into the amusement park and climb into the roller coaster on the edge of the cliff. It lurches dangerously over the precipice and they comprehend just how fragile their brief organic life really is. As the roller coaster turns the corner they are confronted with this imposing House of God with a statue of Jesus on the roof. And suddenly they realize, "OmiGod! If I don't remove my hand from where it is now, I'll be headed straight for HELL!"

It's brilliant.

Of course, a more secular minded teenager might use the threat of death to his or her advantage, (hee! hee! "SECular") and use the couple's impending doom to justify a quick non-church-sanctioned conjugation. "Had we but world enough and time…" Yada, yada, yada.

The same friend who believed I would never bring myself to buy another pair of shoes, had a phrase for this, "Carpe Babum". Loosely translated, this is, "Seize the Babe!" But I'm sure he never rode a cliff-side church-owned roller coaster. If he had, perhaps he would have realized just how important the sole is.

Posted by YandaMan at 12:16 PM | Comments (1)

March 22, 2004

On the Costa Dorada for St. Patrick's Day

(more pics - of Barcelona)
(more pics - of Sitges)
(more pics - of Tarragona)

After partying in the castle for a weekend it just seemed too much of a shock to go directly home so I flew off to Barcelona with my mother and my dear friend Derrick. The expedition was partially prompted by Derrick's obsession with visiting every country in the world. He's at 52 countries now. My mother's new husband is at 53. However, he is seven years older than Derrick so the contest is pretty close.

Actually, Derrick had already been to Spain, but Barca had the best connections when we looked at our return flights from Belfast and my mother had never been there. We stayed in the town of Sitges, about half an hour south of Barcelona. It's a bustling gay resort during the summer. In March, it was pretty quiet. Our hotel was La Villa Santa Maria which a friend had recommended. It is a nice little place right on the beach. We watched surfers from our own little balcony and befriended the waiters in the hotel restaurant.

We only spent one day in Barcelona itself, and most of that day was taken up running up and down the spiral stairs of the Sagrada Familia. Damn, that place is cool. I was glad we were there in low season though. I think it would be hell to be jammed up in those tiny staircases with throngs of sweaty tourists in the summer Spanish heat.

On my actual birthday we went south to the town of Tarragona and wandered around some Roman ruins. I was a bit braindead that day. I've known Derrick since we were thirteen and we meet up every couple of years. My mother took one room in the Santa Maria and Derrick and I shared another. A side effect of this arrangement was that Derrick and I stayed up late every night chatting in the dark.

I'd just like to say what a fan I am of Mediterranean shutters. They're great. They block out the sun when they're closed. They let the sun in when they're open. They make a satisfying clunking sound when you close them. They let you sleep in in the mornings. Shutters rule!

Anyway, we'd stayed up too late the night before and I'd had too much Cava and so I spent my birthday staggering around Roman ruins ruminating on how they were just not designed to have many comfortable napping places. Actually, when you think about it, ruins aren't really designed much at all. They just happen.

Much like turning 40 -- it just happens. I just happen to be 40 now. I don't mind that much. I'd like to have my twenty year old knees back. But that's about my only complaint.

Posted by YandaMan at 10:16 PM | Comments (1)

March 16, 2004

Basking in Barca Birthday Bliss

Uh-oh, internet café is about to close...

I´m turning 40 tomorrow and am at a Beach resort South of Barcelona with my friend Dhariqo and my lovely and hyper-wise mother. We just fled Northern Ireland where I had an absolutely fabulous party (if I do say so myself) at Belle Isle Castle with 23 friends. We were there for the whole weekend, but Saturday night was the party night proper and had a James Bond theme.

The place was far better than I imagined. My charming spousal unit, Dr. Vicki made some fantastic food and everyone looked fabulous.

But I´m being kicked out now, so more updates (and pics) to follow...

Ciao...

Posted by YandaMan at 8:00 PM | Comments (0)

August 25, 2002

Rain, and so time for home...

ACK! Just about to get on the bus back home. There was a bit of a monsoon last night. It absolutely poured rain from about 10pm until 6am. It was extremely loud on the roof of our shack. This morning the view out to sea was lovely -- shafts of sunlight breaking through a far grey sky, a lone sailing yacht prancing over some largish waves. We had café con leche at a table by the beach and read the paper. All very civilised. I'm beginning to enjoy this laidback life. Too bad it will all be over in a couple of days.

But now to the bus and the 28 hour ride home.

Posted by YandaMan at 11:44 AM

August 24, 2002

Learn to Limbo and Be a Star!

Vicki and I decided to embrace the package holiday thing and went to the Barbecue being hosted by the Campsite. It was kind of fun but everyone else was there as part of a family with small children so we didn't quite fit in. We all sat at tables and they brought plates of extremely chewable meat around to everyone. There were also a couple of limbo-dancing contests: one for the kids and one for the adults. I was slightly tempted to enter the one for the adults but Vicki wasn't up for it and I chickened out at the last moment.

Two thoughts went through my head while I was watching the festivities.
1. Learn to limbo dance and you will have a skill that will make you the star of every wedding and important social occasion for the rest of your life.
2. In a limbo competition there is only one winner, but a whole bunch of losers.

Posted by YandaMan at 6:29 PM

August 23, 2002

Trip to Spain: Marimurtra

These pics were all taken from the Marimurtra Botanical Garden in Blanes, but they don't really show the garden itself, just views from the garden.

Posted by YandaMan at 8:06 PM

August 22, 2002

Trip to Spain: Diamond Lodge

Me, lounging on the couch of our Diamond Lodge at Camping SolMar in Blanes on the Costa Brava. DAMN! I'm sexy.

The lodge is really a prefab mini-AtcoTrailer like thing. It was new and had a kitchen with nice pots, pans etc. and a shower and decent beds. Nothing too special, but it was comfortable enough, I suppose.

Posted by YandaMan at 7:49 PM

Barcelona and the Dutch

Took the train to Barcelona a couple of days ago. The train was great. It was on time, air-conditioned, clean, and cheap. Kind of like what English trains must dream of being.

Barcelona is gorgeous, filled with absolutely crazy architecture. They were celebrating some anniversary of Gaudi's birth, death, loss-of-virginity, or something, so we wandered around the town and took a gander at some of his buildings. We went on a tour of Casa Milla and walked around the outside of the Sagruda Familia amongst others. We didn't actually go into the Sagruda Familia which I'll have to do another day. We were a bit hot and tired by that point in the day and there was a bit of a line (in the way that Jupiter is a bit of a planet). Crazy stuff, though, all of it. This area of Spain produced Gaudi, Picasso, and Dali: all of whom specialised in weird-ass art. That alone is a good reason to move here.

The Hell with dreaming of a one bedroom flat in London that I can't afford. I now dream of a crazy brightly coloured weirdly shaped palace in Barcelona that I can't afford.

Why am I living in London anyway? It's filthy. Public transport there is the laughing stock of Europe. When you go out, no one wants to eat anything; they just want to drink gallons of horrific tasting beer and throw up in the street. Barcelona ROCKS compared with London, although admittedly I was only there for a day. Continued exposure might reveal a few flaws. I suspect the heat could get to me after a while.

Oh, and I don't speak Spanish. I should probably sort that out before I move here. I bought what I thought was some antiperspirent the other day and it seems to be some kind of aeresol perfume. I'm still spraying it on my pits in the hopes that it's just strongly scented but I'm a touch doubtful. Vicki says it "smells like Germany". Whatever that means.

Possibly it was intended for the German Tourist market, though there don't seem to be a lot of Germans here. Lots of Dutch though. If you have to pick a holiday resort town, by the way. You can't do much better than picking one full of Dutch tourists.

English and German package tourists have some rather well-documented flaws. But Dutch tourists seem to consist entirely of gorgeous impossibly tall blonde women with a penchant for going topless on the beach. They also have one of the most amusing accents in the world. They all sound like some kind of cartoon character, the kind that makes you laugh just to hear them.

Easy on the eyes, easy on the ears: that´s the Dutch.

Posted by YandaMan at 5:07 PM | Comments (2)

August 21, 2002

To Hell With Treeplanting

There was a complete dearth of people like Liv Tyler on the bus to Spain.

I was reminded once again that long bus trips just are not pleasant. It wasn't a horrific trip by any means. I've been on much nastier trips. Some particularly unpleasant treeplanting bus trips come to mind for instance.

Lately, I seem to have had a few mildly unpleasant experiences which have created a kind of twisted nostalgia for my old life. I was at a friend's engagement party recently. We were in the back garden in the evening and there were a few mosquitos. I think I got bitten twice but it was enough to transport me back to the camps and engender a wonderful warm glow that this was the worst bug experience I'd had in more than a year. It was nothing like being eaten alive by black flies in Northern Ontario or breathing in clouds of mosquitos in the Liard.

The bus trip was a bit like that evening. It was unpleasant enough to put me back in that frame of mind where I would be riding or driving (even worse) a battered old school bus for days at a time over terrible roads in worse weather, but it was still comparatively comfortable. There was air-conditioning. The seats reclined. And there was a "Casper the Friendly Ghost" video (amongst others).

It has given me a new repetoire of toasts along the lines of, "To Hell with Treeplanting" and "Death to the Spoon!"

I've discovered, by the way, that the English need to have toasts explained to them. It's not enough to turn to a random group of Englishmen and shout 'Death to the Spoon!" or "Thank God for the Newfies!" and expect them to raise their glasses with you. They need to know what the hell it is you're ranting about. I don't mind explaining but it seems only polite for them to join me in my toast first.

Why does it have to mean anything? Does "Cheers!" mean anything? They all mean roughly the same thing, "Drink with me and be my friend." Thus the subtle message that those bastards at Dave's birthday party were sending when they refused to drink until I explained what a Newfie is and why we should thank God for them was that they didn't consider me to be their friend. Bunch of bastards!

Anyway, the bus trip was one of those experiences that prompted an internal toast of "To Hell with Treeplanting". It reminded me of how unpleasant that life could be, but at the end dropped me off at a small Spanish Town with the Mediterranean stretched out before my feet and nothing to do but read books, swim in the sea, and loaf. This, as opposed to being expelled into a small Canadian town with a savage bug-infested wilderness at my feet and a summer of barely endurable toil ahead of me.

Death to the Spoon!

Posted by YandaMan at 5:55 PM | Comments (5)

August 20, 2002

Trip to Spain: Placa Reial

This is in the Placa Reial in Barcelona. I was trying to get Vicki to do her "sexy face". I'm not sure if this is it or not.

Posted by YandaMan at 6:01 PM

Trip to Spain: Sagrada Familia

This may look like a simple crap snapshot but there was a lot of effort and art put into this shot. In the background is a very recent chunk of the Sagrada Familia which I thought looked extremely evil in a "Lord of the Rings" kind of way. So I got Vicki to do her best Saruman impression, but she was too short to fit in the picture so I also had to get her to jump at just the right moment. I'm not sure it quite worked out. Somehow it seems less threatening in this picture than it was at the time.

Posted by YandaMan at 4:30 PM

Trip to Spain: Casa Milla

Pix taken on the roof of Gaudi's crazy apartment building in Barcelona, Casa Milla.

Posted by YandaMan at 2:06 PM | Comments (1)